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Norfolk Broads: Day 5 – 22.04.16…………..So long, farewell its time to say goodbye!

It seems that everyone went out like a light on their return from the White Horse Pub last night. Less alcohol had been consumed than normal, we even brought a bottle back with us, so I guess it was four days of fresh air that made us so tired.

Great, we were looking forward to a nice long sleep without interruptions. This was easier said than done because at exactly 1.56am both Maice and I woke up needing to use the 'onboard facility'. We had no option really as the boatyard's loo was out of action. All around us was deathly quiet, so much so that you could hear a pin drop so we had a very quite conflab about how we were going to manage ourselves without making 'a noise'. We needn't have bothered as seconds later it seemed that the all the boys had the same idea as us, and of course as their tools are more flexible than ours they managed to partake in this nighttime ritual over the side of their boats. Because our boat was sandwiched in-between the two boys boats we were party to what can only be the sounds of Niagara Falls on one side and Victoria Falls on the other plus there were conversations going on right, left and centre. Obviously this melee made it much easier for Maice and I which we thought was hilarious. Ten minutes later a deathly hush ascended over the boats and all that could be heard was the gentle snores circulating in the atmosphere. How Claire and Lindsey slept through this nighttime activity is anyone's guess.

Maice and I were up with the lark again and went for a walk along the riverbank. It was so serene and the clouds made for some excellent photos (though we say so ourselves). Back at the boatyard both Lindsey and Claire were up so we set about packing and getting the boat ready to hand back to the boatyard. Typically, there was no sign of movement from the boys boat so we sat around our gas heater warming up our hands. Finally, the boys were up, but it took at least another hour for them to load up the cars. The previous owner of the boatyard, Anne had popped over to say hello and was waiting to see Timmy but he seemed oblivious to all this, making at least twenty trips to and from the boat to his car, packing it up. What on earth had he brought with him! He finally joined us and we presented Ann with a gift from the crew and took some photos. Finally, yes the final finally as we were going off in separate cars, we said our goodbyes and met up ten minutes later at the cafe in Acle where we enjoyed our last breakfast together.

We were reminiscing about our week away and all agreed it was definitely the best to date......although we seem to say this every year. It also brought into question the sailing abilities of our crewmen, what with all the bumping and crashing into banks and boats! Honestly, call themselves sailors! It is at this point therefore that we should give some consideration to the crew commander, Admiral of the Fleet Sir Timmy Tim Tim and indeed bring into question his sailing prowess. Should an Admiral not show leadership and great skill in the command of his fleet and crew. It would appear that this responsibility left him on this trip leaving his crew to their own devices. Did he not run aground his boat purposefully in the hope that his rival Sir Neilly Mou of the Noggins on using the Mary Quant pole become skewered and end up a cadaver in the river? And did he not seek revenge on a rather large wooden post marker, ripping it forcefully from where it stood like a sentinel, just because it 'got in his way'! And did he not try to shake his crew overboard when he manoeuvred his boat so fast before Ludham bridge that a major collision was averted, thanks to the onboard crew's shouts and screams, the only casualty fortunately being to the burgee. And did he not consume so much 'cava' on board that his suggestions to tack up the river was not due to lack of wind but the fact that he couldn't steer in a straight line. I put it to you all, fellow crew that maybe next year Admiral Sir Timmy Tim Tim be stripped of his stripes and that the girls take on the leadership of this Armada of three, with the exception of Maice of course who behaved just as badly as the boys. Okay, so it's only a suggestion...........where would we be without our 'national treasure' Admiral of the Fleet Sir Timmy Tim Tim!

So there we have it folks, everyone got home safely and life soon returned to normality. Another great sailing holiday was had by all and we look forward to next year, already booked 25 - 29 April 2017.

Until next time….

M&A and the motley crew! XX

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